No. I think I will continue to fight as well as continue to love. I don’t know why but the idea of giving up on my daughter eludes me. Persecution. I know what you did. All will come out in the wash. But I won’t. I don’t know why I know this.

No. I think I will continue to fight as well as continue to love. I don’t know why but the idea of giving up on my daughter eludes me. Persecution. I know what you did. All will come out in the wash. But I won’t. I don’t know why I know this.

It’s just something that I thought at first to be a problem… strange. But it turned into a solution. Immortality is a strange gift. To understand that you won a war against gruesome blood thirsty murderers but only gave a shit because you loved your daughter.. 

My Baby Bella and truth as we know it,

For these are the good things but I failed to show it.

I tried more than anyone out there,

Died?

Yeh I gave it a go but must be held here by prayer….

My mother… Her circle of prayers, that never gave in.

Even in times when Life grew awfully grim.

I can set fire to all acid burn, skin burn neutered by milk,

And bathe in the sunshine of what is my ilk.

My brothers have left now,

They travel above,

While I traverse below

With the bottom feeders grappling and gripping but slow,

Is the mark,

In Centennial park,

Where I slept intermittently, daytime and dark.

I have seen the fucking gun and am now sure of intent,

So blow out my brains cunt,

Sell my carcass for rent,

Kill me so slowly that even in times when I feel as though,

There may be a chance, that I’ll live but then- no.

I see that child, she is hopeless and lost, Just as her father was—

So much for cost….

She suffers on and I safely return, to the place where I cameth,

The place where I’ll burn

Cos in this place I burnt and popped film like a bubble

Yeh whatever fuck yourself--- I was trouble,

And in trouble out of it yell and then shout a bit,

Then get to seasoning,

I was well seasoned,

I was well bruised and tenderized reasoned with,

But at the last step showed no remorse- left.

For there was no more here for me to do but stage left.

I had entered stage right,

Now is my time I will no longer fight…

Chris Canham 2010

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